Everything You Wanted To Know About Mixing J-Lube (but were afraid to ask) (2025)

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It's Heloise's Kitchen Hints time for the knowledgeable buttplayer!

I was recently asked by a play buddy exactly how I'd mixed the J-Lube I'd used with/on him, presumably because it was just the right consistency. I use a particularly odd-yet-easy recipe which my husband, R., taught me after watching me struggle with mixing J-lube with one recipe/method that's very popular on the web.*

Nobody else mixes J-Lube like my husband and I do, and I don't know why, because our method is stupefyingly fast and easy. The only drawback is you need a specific type of hand-held blender. ("The right tool for the right job!") The proportion we use is:

3 Tablespoons J-Lube
1-1/3 cups of water

We use a Braun Minipimer, which is a hand-held immersion blender (click here to see an example). The Braun comes with a narrow and high mixing tube which is perfect for mixing J-Lube. The immersion blender does NOT do well in anything but very steeply-sided bowls. The mixing tube that comes with it works best for this. I've seen a couple of competing immersion blender products which look very much like the Braun, and I'm sure they work just as well (as long as they include a mixing tube).

Worth noting: I've mixed J-Lube in a regular blender, but there's an awful lot of scraping down the sides of the container and reblending to get rid of lumps and bumps. I find the method rather slow and tedious.

• Dump the J-Lube into the mixing tube, gently add the water, and use the blender to blend the hell out of it for about 3 minutes, or until all lumps are gone. You may have to S-L-O-W-L-Y move the blender up and down in the mixing tube while it's running to get rid of any lumps and bumps.
• After you've decanted the mixed J-Lube into a suitable container (see below for one such example), the easiest way to clean the blender is to put hot water and a few drops of Dawn detergent into the mixing tube and run the blender for 15 or 20 seconds to get the blades clean, then rinse it off in hot water.
• As far as packaging J-Lube, I use a simple Rubbermaid flip-top "sipping" plastic water bottle from Target. The Rubbermaid part numbers are #3160 (20 ounce) and #3162 (32 ounce). I usually remove the internal siphon tube from the bottle, as it's not quite wide enough to dispense something as viscous as J-Lube.
• J-Lube should be refrigerated right away if it's not being used. It's supposed to only keep for a couple of weeks, but I've had no problem with keeping a premixed batch in our (very cold) refrigerator for up to six weeks.
• Before using the refrigerated J-Lube, I unscrew the lid from the Rubbermaid bottle and warm it in the microwave for up to 3 minutes STOPPING AFTER EACH 60 SECONDS to ensure that the J-Lube isn't boiling ... or boiling over. I usually nuke it for 2 minutes, at which point only about half of it is warm, but swirling the bottle for a few seconds mixes the cool and warmed lube to produce a nice room temperature. You can use warm (rather than room temp) J-Lube if you want -- it feels incredible! -- but be aware that heat breaks down J-Lube over time. I don't reheat the same batch more than 2 or 3 times before tossing it out and making a new one.
• When taking J-Lube on the road (e.g., to a play party), I usually put the Rubbermaid bottle into a (very large) Ziploc style plastic bag, to prevent accidental leakage into the rest of my play bag.
• To wash away J-Lube, I use Dawn dishwashing detergent, although some guys I know prefer to rub down their hands (or other body parts) with salt. I think that's a bit abrasive, so I stick with Dawn which, as you've found out from playing here, is sold in a foaming version in pump bottles which are perfect for the shower.
• Because J-Lube has a limited lifespan, I don't keep it in the shower to lube up my shower shot. Instead, I use a product called J-Jelly, which is made by the same company as J-Lube. J-Jelly is sort of a premixed, stabilized version of J-Lube. I buy both J-Lube and J-Jelly from NASCO Farm & Ranch Supplies, where historically I've found the cheapest prices for both products. I do NOT recommend buying these products at a leather store, because they'll usually charge at least twice what NASCO does.

And becuase I know someone's going to ask if I don't add this...I use Kirkland brand nitrile gloves from Costco. Best in terms of fit, quality and price that I've ever found.

*

And I have no idea why the method I was struggling with is so popular, because I found it slow, painstaking and fussy. The common method I'm referring to is to use a regular kitchen mixer in a microwave safe bowl, alternately mixing and nuking the J-Lube to remove lumps and bumps. As indicated above, I used that method exactly once. It was long, tedious, and very, very messy compared to R.'s method, which takes me literally all of 5-10 minutes, including decanting the J-Lube and washing, drying, and stowing away the immersion blender.This entry was originally posted at http://ethicalslut.dreamwidth.org/32031.html.
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